Because, Idiot
by Crystal Remnant
Summary: We all think of Joe as our lovable, suave, romantic and downright perfect fighting machine. But he is, after all, still just a teenager.


**Title:** Because, Idiot.  
**Rating: **Eh…T  
**Characters: **00's and Dr. Gilmore  
**Summary: **We all think of Joe as our lovable, suave, romantic and downright perfect fighting machine. But he is, after all, a teenager in a robotic body.

**A/N: **I've taken on a challenge called the Outstretched Fingers Challenge – it's simple; whatever genre you write in regularly, you after to switch to the opposite. Unfortunately, that's made me extremely twitchy – I can only write so much angst. So I'm blowing it off.

Yay.

**

* * *

Explaining is the hardest thing a man can do… But admitting to it is another story all together. **

When he was in his early teens he was told something very important that he kept in mind everyday afterwards, because it was probably the best advice he'd ever been given.

Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics.

As stupid as it had sounded at first, he soon realized that it was a universal truth. He was a teenage boy, and as most know, teenage boys are extraordinarily prone to doing completely stupid stunts and equally as brainless things. That simple truth had kept him out of more embarrassing situations, even if he was the one who had to explain to the ambulance, hospital staff, doctor or priest _why _one of his friends was screaming (sticking certain appendages into appliances where they don't belong was also something he learned to _never, ever _do).

Unfortunately, his lucky streak could only last so long.

It wasn't the most embarrassing thing that could've happened, but explaining why boredom had driven him to shove ten Tic Tacs up his nose to Doctor Gilmore – who then spent the next three hours digging them all out – was a good enough lesson.

**It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt…**

It wasn't very often that he found himself with little to do, but one Sunday morning he found that there was, in fact, absolutely nothing to do _at all. _The restaurant was closed on Sundays, and Saturdays were cleaning which meant that there was nothing to do around the household either. The smarter ones in the group had arranged for something to do that day – shopping, errands, stalking or research, but he wasn't one of the front runners in the small dysfunctional family.

He didn't know it, but G.B had the same problem.

So when the British actor woke that morning and found Joe lying listlessly on the floor, he suggested some games to pass the time. Ideas were tossed around – Monopoly, chess, and Iron Chef – but there was one game that they decided on.

Truth or Dare.

It was the best idea, they had both agreed, because they hadn't played it for so long. It had started off relatively slow; who'd you like? Dare you to eat this; dare you to lick that; but eventually the dares became more and more dangerous until G.B was the one who drew the line.

"I'm not doing it."

"C'mon, how bad could it be?"

"Very. I'm not doing it, Joe."

Sighing, the younger Cyborg stood from his spot on the ground ("You look like a cat stretched out like that…") and walked over to one of the walls. Crouching down, he ignored his comrade and moved one of the chairs over slightly to reveal a white rectangle in the wall.

"No, don't you-"

"I'm just going to prove to you-"

"I don't care. You're not going to stick your finger in an electrical socket-!"

"How bad could it-"

Upstairs, Dr. Gilmore was going over some notes with one of his quieter family, G Junior, when the lights suddenly flickered violently for a few moments. They could both hear the thrum of electricity as it focused on one point of the house before flickering back to normal. Blinking a few times, the old Doctor wondered what could've caused such a thing, but turned back to his work when it didn't happen again.

**Some things stay between friends **

"I did not."

"You so did."

"I did not!"

"You so did!"

"I DIDN'T!"

"YOU DID!"

"…I didn't steal Francoise's underwear, Jet."

"…Alright, I believe you."

"Thank you."

"So…what colour are they?"

"Blu- - JET!!"

**It takes 42 muscles to frown, but only four to flip 'em the bird. **

He had done it when he was little – he knew that. But he couldn't remember why he had stopped doing it… The Father had never physically punished any of them, and he had no parents to smack him. He'd wondered about it some nights, and wasted some days thinking about it. And then, one summer afternoon, he realized why he had stopped.

"Stay where you are, 00 Cyborgs!"

"No way!"

"EAT THIS!"

_Ka-chunk. _

"009?"

"Yes, 008?"

"Did you just flip them the bird?"

"I find that the bullet lodged in my butt says all."

* * *

Much better… 

- Crystal Remnant


End file.
